Almost Legal

I knew it was coming up but I guess I just put it out of my mind. Did not want to face it. My oldest is turning 18 in two months. 60ish days that I still have any real legal say, at least in his mind and the governments, in what he does, says, doesn't do, etc. Of course I still say things that I swore I would not say like "You'll be under my rules while you're living in my house" and the ever popular "Why should I mortgage the equivalent of a small island to pay for your college if you don't follow my rules".
It all has do with control of course. Control that I lost a long time ago if I'm really being honest. This is my firstborn, the most outwardly sensitive and compassionate of the bunch. Travels to the beat of his own drummer. Incredible brilliant (really. Crazy high IQ), but very scattered. Of course he would never would have had all the accomplishments that he he has with out this combination. He is a gifted actor, singer, musician. He accomplished a lot of "firsts" in our little haven of a town. He will do wonderful things, he just has that thing, that unexplainable x factor. When he is on the stage your eyes are drawn to him, when he sings or composes a piano or guitar piece it is always haunting and so familiar at the same time. He is an idealist. He will not do anything that does not bring him personal satisfaction, and he is very hard on himself. I have done the usual coming of age lecture about paying your dues and how tough the competition in his chosen fields are. How he is a big fish in a really small pond right now and that will change. He knows it will and he welcomes that change, or at least tell me does. He does however, continually proves to me over and over again that he knows what he is doing.

His first paying job was singing at a friends wedding. Second paying job as one piece of the duo that is the new house band at a very popular local establishment. He did not find these on his own, yet other people sought him out and hand these things to him on a silver platter. He would happily do this for no pay, but is realistic in that sense. Currently he is busking in Harvard Square with a good friend of his and is drawing quite the fan base. Busking, if you are not familiar, is the official name for street performing. You must obtain a busking license in order to be a busker. I know, we too have been joking around about this for weeks, which of course drives him crazy. I figured that Harvard Square being pretty much the busking capital of the world (or at least in the top 10) would be fraught with social politics, tough characters, and lots of rules of the road. I pointed this out to him (not that I have ANY experience to speak of in busking, but I do have common sense which sometimes he lacks) and he promptly told me that he had it under control and to not worry. That he had to learn this things on his own. Something that I told my parents over and over again from 15 to 20ish. I should just trust him and know that he usually comes out pretty good. After three trips to Harvard Square the first one netted $0, second one in a different location $25 The third weekend proved to be pivotal. After two previous trips to Harvard Square they figured out the best place to play, befriended a homeless man in the alley behind them who happened to scare off anyone else that wanted to play in that spot (a coveted spot apparently) and had a pretty big crowd surrounding them. Lots of requests for business cards, websites, and other social media info. Three hours on the third trip netted him $54 dollars. $18 dollars an hour to do something he absolutely LOVES and getting exposure that he otherwise would not get. Many people filmed them, talked about collaborating on projects, took pictures and were generally really interested in their music. Of course they also had the real "women" and typical fangirls asking for numbers and giggling because of course they are good looking as well as talented, along with their $5000 orthodontically correct smiles. Plus, we all know musicians get a certain "allowance" in the looks department that someone, say working in CVS, would not get. However even on a bad hair day they both look like men, even though they are still technically man-boys, have unruly curly hair (translate to they do nothing with it) and it still looks really cool and hipster and they are good looking. I kind of figured that one out when he started high school and a lot of the Mommies were drooling over him that I would have trouble and it has never stopped.

My first job was working at a nursing home as a cleaner making $5ish dollars an hour, second job as an order picker for a local department store. Eventually I too found my dream job. However, I was probably close to 26 before I was making close to $18/hour without working two jobs.

I'm thinking I need to let up on the control and just revel in the responsible(ish), talented, charming and bright man that he has become. What do you think?

We have Teenagers on our Hands!

This morning, as we were all lounging on the family bed, we started some interesting discussions. In no particular order, here are some snippets.

I like to think of my (manhood for lack of a better word) as a raging dog, a rottweiler, german shephard mix as it were...

I want to go to the mall, I want to go to the mall, I want to go to the mall...

Speaking of (insert girlfriend's name) attributes...

Honey, I think we have teenagers on our hands (covers head with pillow and moans)

Hey, makeout with me and they will leave the room...

You know I love you, don't you?

Good times, good, good, times!

jules

Magnolia Tree

We have a beautiful magnolia tree in our front yard. We purchased it at Home Depot the year Nick was born, the sapling was about a foot tall. The tree is now taller than our house and just about as wide. Every year, there is a magical week, usually the middle of April, where the buds start forming and the blooms open. I'm always astonished by how gorgeous the flowers are, but that the inside of the magnolia is the true work of art. It took me years and years to realize how stunning the inside of the blossom was. I find it interesting that we find the same about our children. We are with them every day, we think we know them and what they are thinking and then they become teenagers. We start to notice changes, first small, then bigger, and then there is that one day that you truly see that whats inside them is truly the most beautiful part.

Picture of the Day - Some of the cousins

Brianna, Brandon, Sam, Kimberly, Nick

Brian, Ben, Kayla

Another One Bites the Dust

Nick and Sam have been taking part in theatre and acting for quite some time. Arlington Children's Theatre has long been our home away from home. This year, Nick's best friend Mitchell joined the theatre world, first with the school play and now with Seussical. We never in a million years thought that Ben would enjoy acting. I mean you have to get on a stage, in front of people and stuff and (gasp!) they may want you to talk, dance, or sing! This is NOT what Ben is about. At least until yesterday. A potential opportunity arose, by way of an ensemble part (a Fish/Cadet to be exact), Ben said "maybe, just maybe, he would like to be in the play". Al and I kind of laughed it off.  We then found out that the part was vacant and would be a perfect fit for all his requirements (no singing, dancing or acting alone - group is fine). He waffled back and forth, not committing until this evening - right before practice this evening. He said he would try it out and then tell me his decision. This is progress people, BIG progress for Ben. My friend Deb was scheduled to drive all the boys to practice and I thought, oh no, he won't go if I'm not driving him. Guess what? Deb came, he threw on his coat and happily got into the car without even a goodbye.

Al met him at the theatre on his way home from work, Ben could have cared less. I think at this point we are almost an embarrasement to him. How did this happen at 9! With Nick it really happened last year, 13 for pete's sake. We were an embarrasement to Sam at a very early age, like 2 weeks old. Ben though, I thought it would be longer. The last of my babies to love me and only me, just because I am Mom. I still get a few "you're the greatest Mom in the world", generally when they want money.

Anyway, I called Ben in the car on the way home from his first practice and asked him how it went. In his normal deadpan way he said "fine". But when asked if he enjoyed it, I got a "sure" out of him. In BenSpeak that means yes, very much. However, the motherlode came when I was just putting him to bed. I asked again what he liked, he said "everything" and when asked if he wanted to continue I got a big, huge "YES".
This boy is making major strides my friends, major strides!

Picture of the Day - Christmas Morning 2009

Christmas Drama

Christmas is over, along with all but one of the 12 birthdays we have between November and January. Here is a recap of how everything went.

• Was told by middle son that this Christmas did not seem like the "small Christmas" he expected. In fact, he could not understand why he received so much. This was great until his Father overheard and went off on me again!
• My Darling Dad has been back and forth to the Dr. and hospital with sudden hypertension attacks. Please pray that they will get this under control and find the root cause.
• My Brother Matt and Family decided to surprise us and visit a few days after Christmas. There is nothing like cooking for 17! Thank goodness for the giant motorhome that they drove here in. Wonderul to see them all - the kids are growing up so quickly!
  
• Boys received their roles in Seussical on the Sunday after Christmas. Nick is Horton, Sam is JoJo, and Ben, yes Ben, may actually take a part as a Fish/Cadet (this is a HUGE step for him!)
• I had a few friends and family members mad at me for one reason or another, further adding to the stress!
• Oldest son had teen New Year's Party and was extremely rude and ungrateful. Still mad!
• Seussical rehearsals started at Arlington Children's Theatre, thus the beginning of driving back and forth to Arlington three times a week - fun, fun, fun!
  

That pretty much sums up the last couple weeks. I will elaborate on some of these topics in future posts.

Hope you all had a lovely, peaceful Christmas and New Year